主要針對(duì)于在網(wǎng)上搜索到的買(mǎi)家:
Hello, My dear Friend,
I hope this letter finds you
I am writing to you after I carefully browsed your websites, I was really impressed by your website, your items are amazingly beautiful, but ours are worth your attention too.
Have you thought about looking for a long-term and steady manufacturer of tattoo machine and accessories from China?
If yes, ok, this is the chance for both of us!
We are the manufacturer of all kinds of xx machines for 10 years , main sell xx xx xx xx xx xx , etc... We promise the high quality, competitive price and best services.
You can view our products at:xxxx or xxxx . We are looking for strong business partners like you to expand both of our business. We sincerely hope that you can join in us and bring both of us a chance to cooperate with & a bright future. Thank you for your patience and time.
Looking forward for your early reply, hope we can have the chance to cooperate.
Best regards.
Yours Sincerely
------------------------------
Sharry Zhang
xxxx Manufactory
Tel: xxx
Fax: xxxx
E-mail: xxx
Website: xxx
Add:xxx
寫(xiě)的很好，值得學(xué)習(xí)！假如能再短一點(diǎn)會(huì)更好哦！
YOUR LETTER IS GOOD ,STUDY FROM YOU
呃...我看不懂！5555怎么寫(xiě)內(nèi)貿(mào)的啊？我昨天都急死了！
太長(zhǎng)，? 應(yīng)該點(diǎn)題就是重點(diǎn)
120 字左右吧
不夠精練，如果我們是BUYER,不會(huì)有耐心讀完的。
哈，Sharry
寫(xiě)得不錯(cuò)，很有新意。這封招攬交易信的風(fēng)格我喜歡，可以吸引我從頭看到尾，哈
給你改一下文法上的錯(cuò)誤，其他的保持原貌。當(dāng)然有些句子是可以有改善的空間，這是我在網(wǎng)站里看到的最有新意的招攬交易信的寫(xiě)法。
"everything is well with your endeavors"這句改為 everything is going well with you.
websites 改為 website
main sell 改為 mainly selling
partners 改為 partner
bring both of us , 改為 give both of us
bring both of us a chance to cooperate with & a bright future. 這句應(yīng)該改良一下，語(yǔ)意有些不明。
cooperate 改為 to serve you
John
??余仰安??回復(fù)??余仰安?取消似乎有點(diǎn)長(zhǎng)哦.
